Some of you know that I am also a poet. Often my two worlds intersect. More often, they collide. I worry sometimes that mothering is too limiting a topic for poetry, that it narrows my reach, marks me in some way inferior or as the dread, “woman writer.” But over and over again I hear “write what you know” and truly, I don’t know what else I could write.
It is a conundrum that in the rare quiet moments away from my daughter, my work on attachment, and family responsibilities, I write about being her mom. For me, poetry usually comes unbidden, a thing demanding wings, words insistent and immediate. Here is one I’ve been asked to share.
I Am My Daughter’s Keeper
I am my daughter’s keeper
The repository of her fears
The arms that hold her against her will
When she struggles against demons so fierce
They cannot be contained
I am my daughter’s keeper
The territory of her refuge
The boundary of her rage
Before language could contain her thoughts
I was her thoughts
I was her shield
The soft giving place
For pounding fists
And kicking limbs
I am my daughter’s keeper
My patience numbed with repetitive chatter
Takes in one more question
One more idea fixe around which
She cannot journey
In sulky silence
She breaks my heart again
As I fail to understand
Some simple need
Some desire to communicate
A look
A tone of voice
What someone meant
How afraid she was in a fleeting moment
Of a day long past
I am my daughter’s keeper
I hold her memories
Locked inside boxes of my own
Spilling out on quiet nights
When, exhausted from the battles of the day
I wish I could be more
I am my daughter’s keeper
I hold what she struggles to forget
Steady her hand
As she aims higher
Than the world presumes
As she achieves her wholeness
In the wake of wars
Fought inside her mind
I am the keeper of my daughter’s flame
She battles in my daily heart
And flies away again
©4/7/14
Charlotte Simpson
There is no greater gift than the love of your mother. What a beautiful picture of mother and daughter. God is guiding you through her journey in life and thank you for letting me be apart of that Journey. She brings me happiness, joy, laughter. The poem is beautiful and every word came from your heart.